Before I start writing, the credit for this post goes to @attomeybharti, a parody account of AAP leader Mr. Somnath Bharti on twitter. The day Somath Bharti went onto his midnight escapade of saving the city and breaking the law, first thought in mind was, aila Delhi superhero, and I guess with that same thought, @attomeybharti made Somnath Bharti ‘aam Batman’ on Twitter.
This made me thinking, AAP is not a political party; it is not a gang of anarchists as well (no matter how much pride Mr. Arvind Kejriwal may take in claiming himself to be one), but it’s a band of superheroes, who have put aside their egos, personal differences and come together to fight for justice and greater good. This is Aam Avengers Party, out there to save the country or the Congress (I am not sure to whom their loyalty is) and if they can’t save it, then they sure will avenge it.
Since Mr. Somnath Bharti has already been identified as the ‘Aam Batman’ so let us talk about him first, technically Batman isn’t part of Avengers, but then these are all technicalities, which we have seen AAP never gives a damn about. The bigger question is, what is the reason behind Bharti’s late night activities? We all know the story of Khas Batman and his sleepless nights (read the original comics for better understanding and not Nolan’s Batman Begins), but what are his reasons? May be he is still living his days of an engineering student, when students are up all night, mostly playing Counter Strike, or I wonder was it batman-batman during his old days? This Aam Batman, with his scary eyes and cheap smile does a good job in scaring away the ‘outsiders’. For him people from Africa are real threat, and like a ‘sacha desh bhakat’ he goes out scaring them away to leave his ‘mohalla’.
Next in the league is Aap ka Yogender Yadav; I have given a lot of thought about which superhero he is and all I can think of is ‘Captain America’. I don’t know why him, may be because of his air of supremacy and ‘ohh I am the real soldier’ attitude or how no one takes him seriously in his own team. Being Captain attached to his name, he always thinks of himself to be one, but the moment he makes this mistake he is cut down to size. Once the humiliation of constantly being cut down was so much, he even offered to quit the league, but next moment he remembered how without the league no one really cares about him.
In this ‘League of Aam Gentlemen’ we have our very own Flash Gordon, Ashutosh, as the moment he starts speaking or tweeting he will do it nonstop, without even a pause, repeating things, without making much sense. He was the last to join the league so I guess he always try to make up for the lost time with his speed. Moreover he is more of a side kick then a real super hero. He thinks he is cool and very popular, but in reality whenever he opens his mouth, he proves he is suffering from foot and mouth disease and that’s when he starts his tweetathon so that no one can figure it out.
Speaking of side kick, we have one in AAP as well, and that is Manish Sisodia. I would have pegged him for Robin, but then he is not a side kick to Aam Batman. Sisodia, like a good side kick is always putting his life at risk to save that of his mentor (Kejriwal, for those who are totally clueless), he believes in his mentor, will never question his judgement and would obey all his orders. He thinks he can do better than his boss, but every time he tries he messes up. I can’t think of any one whom he resembles so he gets the bonus points for being the only original guy in this party.
Another important member of the league is Thor or Kumar Vishwas; being a Demi God, you might think he will have better looks, but hey, he is not in this for looks. He is suffering from a superiority complex, thinks of himself to be above the rest (asked for a fee of Rs. 8 crore to participate in Big boss, dude you should be grateful they are giving you some work, since you didn’t get the MP’s job) and he is over confident so picks up fight with anyone (remember going up against Rahul Gandhi, in Amethi for 6 months, and 6 were the total votes he got). The only difference between ‘Aam Thor’ and ‘Khas Thor’ (apart from good looks) is unlike ‘Khas Thor’ our Thor losses the battles he picks up.
Moving to the femme fatale, there is one without whom the league will never be complete and that’s Wonder Woman aka Shazia Ilmi, for a simple reason, we all would like to see more of her (not because of the glam factor), but we hardly get to see her, wondering if the wonder woman is even a part of the league or not. Sometimes she is, sometimes she is not and they talk as if she is with them, but we don’t see her with them; it’s all very confusing, no one knows the clear picture.
When talking about women, we cannot forget about Rakhi Birla, the Cat Woman (now remember what I said earlier, they are not in it for the looks). Although she is Cat woman, but in this league she is not Aam Batman’s lover, but given their shared love for breaking the law, they can be brother and sister at best. ‘Aam Cat woman’ is dynamic, hot headed, supposed fire brand and very good at making false allegations (a small cricket ball of kid was told to be a stone pelted by attackers out to kill her). In fact, she even beats up ‘Khas Cat Woman’ in lying and cheating.
Last but not the least is Iron Man, Arvind Kejriwal. Why? You asked why? Well first of all he is sick. Although he is not dying of radiation poisoning of a nuclear reactor in his chest but he is definitely fighting chronic cough in his lungs. You need more reasons, he is egoistic, narcissist, hypocrite and suffering from ‘I am the genius rest all are fools’ syndrome. He will tell us unbelievable stories and expect us to believe them, just because he said so. He will give us logic, which no normal human brain on this planet can comprehend and he thinks he can single handily defeat everyone and doesn’t need anyone’s help, sounds familiar characteristics eh. Moreover he is a billionaire like Tony Stark (you might know this, but all those year as IT commissioner with no transfers, he made his hey while the sun shine) and there is uncanny resembles between his and Downey Jr.’s moustache.
Then there is Anna Hazare or Director Nick Fury, who thinks he is the reason why the Aam Avengers Party are together and they are fighting for him and justice, but in reality they don’t give a shit about what Director Fury has to say. They are there for personal agendas, glory and they know they are much better off without Director Fury, and that’s why treated him like shit.
So that’s the Aam Avengers Party for you, who are above the law and like other superheroes overzealous to save the planet. They don’t give a damn about all the people dying on the streets below, due to the falling debris of buildings they are breaking in this so called fight of theirs to Avenge the country.